Where I'm at.....

Been a while since I've blogged. Since starting the diet back in early December, I'm feeling good. I've still got random flab here and there, but I'm feeling so much stronger and leaner. All of my pants don't fit, but I'm still not ready to go clothes shopping. It's kind of frustrating having to cinch the pants and kind of fold them over in order to put my belt on, but it's better than the alternative (getting fatter).

I'm down to about 220 now (I was as much as 245 at one point). I've still got another 20 lbs to go, then hoping to drop maybe even 10 more lbs after that. I've been able to consistently go to the gym, except for the past week.

I started getting this REALLY bad pain in my upper back/neck area. I've had it at times before, but then it would go away. This time it stayed. It's limited my ability to turn my head, to sit, stand, etc. It hurts so bad. I saw a chiropractor for a consultation on Friday of last week, but since he couldn't get the x-rays instantly developed (like most modern places can) he would have to wait until Monday to diagnose. He used an electrical stimulator on my back for about 10 minutes, which felt GREAT, but after about 5 minutes of being off it, the pain came back. I tried to tough out the pain, but I couldn't make it. On Saturday, at the last minute, I schedule a 1 hr massage and that too felt great as soon as I was done, but about 5 minutes later the pain came back again. I spent all day Sunday with an ice pack on my back and Monday I went into the Chiropractor to find I have a couple of pinched nerves in my neck.

I'm getting treatment with adjustments here and there. Some people say Chiropractors are more like witch doctors. I really don't know what to believe. I know they go to school for what they do and they seem to understand the body well. I really like to believe in the power of having strong mental focus on healing (or at least it being a part of your healing process). Chiropractors stress a lot of healthy living as a part of taking care of your back. I've had 3 adjustments so far and little by little it's feeling better, but I'm not 100% again. He said about 7 or so adjustments should help get rid of the pain.

This is the first time I've gone a week without working out. He said I can go back to working out, just stay away from high-impact stuff and any upper-body workouts. I can't wait to get back to the gym.

One thing that's kind of saved me more than my gym-going is my diet. I remember for the 4+ years we were married, seeing Alene track what she ate every day. I didn't think it was stupid, I just thought it was a pointless waste of time. Now I'm more maticulous than she is about it. My biggest gripe with it was the time it took to track everything. With the help of modern technology, it's really made it easier. My phone synchs with the web site I use, so I don't have to remember everything. I've tried to stay within a 2000 calorie diet and I think that is exactly what has helped me lose weight the most. When I think back, I used to consume at least 3000 calories a day, which is why I gained so much weight. The simple adage that if you eat less calories than you burn, you'll lose weight. I've been able to do it without starving myself, just watching more what I eat. Sodas are now Diet (but every now and then I'll have a regular one). I still eat ice cream in the evening (which I shouldn't either way), so I'm not 100% following the rules, but I'm still losing weight, which is good.

Life itself is moving along. I've now been at my current job for one year. I still feel like I have a ton to learn, but for the most part I have enough knowledge to get by. I rely on my boss for information on a weekly, if not daily basis at times. I'd like to get more independant enough so he can fully trust I can do my job. Work is funny because sometimes It's busy where it looks like a tornado hit my desk, then it's SLOW, but there is always something to be done, even when it's slow.

The family is doing well. Caiden has started seeing a counselor. We thought it would be good for him to have someone to talk to outside of the family, who could allow him to vent or talk about something without worrying about getting in trouble. We've also reluctantly started him on medication for ADHD treatment. I really don't like the idea of him being on medication and I've held out or plainly ignored the warning signs for years, but we felt it should be something we should try. So far he's showing pretty good improvement with being able to stay on task and for the most part is getting his work done in class, which is nice. I love my son so dearly and want so much for him to be happy and have a sense of where he belongs in this world and within our family.

Bailey is so sweet. I love her to DEATH. I've had the good fortune of having some days off (Federal holidays for bank employees) while Alene has worked and just spending time with her is a joy. She's really starting to become a little girl, with a preference for wearing her beaded necklaces. She used to just rip them off, but now she wears them a lot. Alene is still her number one person, as when she wakes up the first thing you hear is "MAMA!" She loves her mom so much. Alene does such a good job raising her and teaching her. There is no doubt in my mind that the wonderful little girl that Bailey is, is a direct result in the wonderful mothering Alene provides. Bailey also loves Caiden so much. The other day when we dropped him off at his mother's, she cried so badly because we left him there. She's really starting to notice and identify our family and that we belong together.

Alene and I are both ready for the spring to come. I wasn't too happy about ground hog day, but for now it appears that the prediction was just for the east-coasters. I'm dieing to get out and hike with Alene, especially now that I'm feeling in shape and know I can keep up with her. If we ever do something hard-core, she always kicks my trash and I feel bad that I have to ask her to slow down at times. I just wish we were able to work out more time together, as I'm sure most couples do. We are settled into a routine, which I know Alene hates, and I really don't mind, so it's hard to try to figure that out between the two of us. I still love Alene with all of my heart and I hope every day she knows it. I'm still not the best at showing it though. Something I need to keep working on. At times I day dream about quitting my job, moving somewhere far away and remote and being happy with her, then my phone rings and reminds me to get back to work. I've got to keep dreaming though.